The Humble Gourmand

The burger trend began to sweep the Washington area about a year and a half ago, and in today’s tight times we certainly see the relevance. In the spirit of cheap, accessible eats that still satisfy the most discerning carnivores, we revisited two of DC’s most popular and revered burger joints, Good Stuff Eatery and Ray’s Hell Burger. Both boast crowds, a laid-back vibe, and solid fare. Read on for the nitty-gritty.

Good Stuff Eatery

Anyone who names his restaurant “Good Stuff Eatery” is either earnestly hopeful or exceedingly self-assured. Having never watched Top Chef, I haven’t observed Good Stuff’s Spike Mendelsohn firsthand. Given his wannabe-Justin Timberlake style and Culinary Institute of America pedigree, I’m inclined to trust the latter.

That is not to say that Mendelsohn’s self-assurance is misplaced. If I were able to crank out fast-food classics that were as tasty and cheap as those of his Capitol Hill spot, I would be pretty pleased with myself, too.

I visited Good Stuff on a weeknight around 8:00pm. It was a little bit crowded, but nothing like the scene at lunchtime when throngs of Hill staffers flock to the place. The setting is bright and lofty, with the floors and walls made to resemble a weathered-down barn and a second floor cramped with white tables.

Let’s start with the least memorable part of the meal: the burger. I was expecting big things after Mr. Mendelsohn’s “Colletti’s Smokehouse” burger bested the mighty Bobby Flay’s Burger Palace entry at the Burger Bash in South Beach last month. Topped with applewood bacon, sharp Vermont cheddar, fried Vidalia onion rings and chipotle BBQ sauce, the burger sounds like a sure bet, and perhaps it is when Mr. Mendelsohn is cooking it himself. But what I received was a relatively small, sloppily wrapped patty with a scrunched bun and no trace of pink meat. The burger was tastier than the offerings at Five Guys, but not by much.

The fries, on the other hand, are first-class. I ordered for Spike’s Village fries, which are topped with fresh thyme, rosemary, and cracked pepper and easily worth the extra 20 cents. They were perfectly cooked: firm and light on the oil. As for dipping sauces, Good Stuff has options galore and a very innovative mayonnaise bar with 4 distinct varieties: mango, Old Bay, chipotle, and sriracha. Each one is worth a try, but the best are the chipotle and siracha. The other two are just a tad too sweet.

The perfect complement to the burger and fries is Good Stuff’s homemade, hand-spun toasted marshmallow milkshake. The menu dubs the shakes “milk-ice-gelato-custard-cream,” and it’s something special. It’s as if someone liquefied and cooled a batch of marshmallows roasted around a campfire. You simply must try it.

You can expect to stuff yourself at Good Stuff for under $15, a real steal given the quality of the fare. I’ll return shortly to try the seven other original burgers and seven other original shakes.

—Peter Rudegeair

Ray’s Hell Burger

Unlike Good Stuff Eatery, a burger from Ray’s won’t disappoint any burger devotees with big appetites. They make ’em huge.

Let’s not get ahead of ourselves here. The first thing you must know is that Ray’s doesn’t announce itself. It’s tucked into a small row of buildings between the Rosslyn and Courthouse neighborhoods of Arlington, in the same strip as its older sister, Ray’s the Steaks. No sign graces its storefront – just a couple pieces of copier paper taped to the glass windows.

On most afternoons or evenings, you’ll know the place by the line. Like Good Stuff, Ray’s operates with an often-lengthy queue of hungry customers snaking between the first-come, first-serve tables. The space is fairly basic, decked with old movie posters, and it’s loud. Very loud. But this won’t register much as you tuck into what is certainly the best burger in the DC metro area.

As you wait in line, avoid the temptation to add the fried cheese balls (name?) or mac and cheese to your order. The sides don’t hold a candle to the main event here – beef – and you’re going to have plenty of it in a minute. In the words of a good friend, focus.

Good luck choosing among the chef’s creations, which number about a dozen and range from the somewhat predictable (cheddar and applewood-smoked bacon) to the wacky yet surprisingly good (Big Poppa, an au poivre choice). Ray’s takes its gourmet toppings a little too far with “The Burger of Seville,” though. There’s no reason to put foie gras and white truffle sauce on a hamburger. It’s like caviar on a hot dog — just too much.

If you’re the picky type, build a custom burger from the extensive slate of options on the menu’s back side. Freebies like sauteed mushrooms and onions are a great touch. Lovers of le fromage will be happy to see several excellent varieties of stinky bleus and sharp cheddars. (Tip: Don’t miss the free hot chocolate while you’re waiting.)

If you have any interest in the bun, eat your burger on-site – otherwise you’ll have a pretty soppy mess by the time you get home. (If that’s the price to be paid for such a juicy, delectable hunk of beef, I’ll pay it every time. Then again, in my book, the bun has always been little more than a distraction.)

Many a Ray’s visitor has decried the missing link of French fries. They’d certainly be a welcome addition to the menu. Also somewhat frustratingly, Ray’s lacks a website. Right about here is where our complaints end, however, and our burger pangs return. Time for another trip to Ray’s.

—Alison L. McConnell

And we declare the winner…. Ray’s!

Good Stuff Eatery

303 Pennsylvania Ave. SE
Washington, DC 20003
Web site

Ray’s Hell Burger

1713 Wilson Blvd.
Arlington, VA 22209

1. marie_m

   April 3 5:45 p.m. 1

   So, the burgers at Good Stuff are "tastier" but smaller than those at Ray's. And Ray's is the winner. Size is the main criteria? What an odd review.

2. Jackson

   April 4 12:55 p.m. 2

   Marie, I didn't get that impression at all. When the Good Stuff review says "The burger was tastier than the offerings at Five Guys, but not by much," I'm not inclined to think they were judged as being particularly amazing. In fact, the gist I got was that the sides were really the main attraction.

   Alison's review of Ray's, on the other hand, comes across quite positive, and suggests that the beef is certainly the main attraction of the meal.

   Since this is a burger face-off, sides don't come into the picture, but it looks like there's rationale for Ray's to win.

3. marie_m

   April 6 3:42 p.m. 3

   Hmm, but Good Stuff's fries are called "first class" and the shakes "a perfect complement to the burger and fries"
   

   At Ray's the reviewer recommends that we don't order any sides - "avoid the temptation...The sides don’t hold a candle to the main event here"

   And the main event is "beef – and you’re going to have plenty of it in a minute" ugh. Personally, I think the bugers at Good Stuff are OK, not great. I've never been to Ray's, but since I'm not especially interested in a mediocre-but bigger-burger, this review doesn't really make me want to visit.
   

4. Alison

   April 7 8:42 a.m. 4

   It was an oversight on my part to not specify that I think the beef itself at Ray's is first-rate -- flavorful and juicy, expertly cooked (though I'm the type that prefers it relatively bloody). Thanks for reading critically!

5. Jackson

   April 16 4:25 p.m. 5

   Alison, I should have known you were the rare meat type when I found that you like your scrambled eggs a little on the runny side. I'm afraid of Ray's because I like things medium-well+, and last time I was at Ray's The Steaks, I couldn't get it cooked more than medium-rare.

   Where does it fall on the spectrum?

6. Jackson

   May 4 7:09 p.m. 6

   Ray's is good.

7. Sherman Fellenbaum

   May 7 10:01 p.m. 7

   What about the 'ole "Assateague Year Old Meat On a Stale Bun Burger". Tasty.

8. Chad

   May 8 12:21 p.m. 8

   That was the only burger I've ever met that I didn't want to eat, Sherman.
   

9. bshrestha

   January 24 8:20 p.m. 9

   I agree that Ray's Hell Burger is great. There is another post on best burgers in DC that may interest you at http://desigrub.com/2010/01/the-best-burger-in-washington-dc/

10. Maqui berry

    May 18 10:56 p.m. 10

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