The Humble Gourmand

I travel quite a bit to random and far-off places (as evidenced by my reviews for this here Humble Gourmand), and I am proud to state that the only time I’ve had the misfortune of food poisoning was from a bad chicken wing in DC.

For this I credit a rather strong stomach (I watch lots of surgery shows) and a few guidelines that — so far — have kept me on the good side of exotic food.

You may have heard some of these before, but I’m hoping that these tips keep your stomach as happy and safe as mine, because it really is possible to eat lots of crazy local dishes and only taste them once, if you know what I mean.

1. Eat yogurt on the plane, if possible, and definitely as soon as you can when you land. The cultures used in local yogurt are — you guessed it — made locally, so it helps your stomach adjust to new bacteria that will be in your water and water.

2. Don’t mistake clotted cream for yogurt at your hotel’s buffet breakfast. This is especially relevant if you’re in a former British colony in the Middle East/Mediterranean, where people eat both clotted cream and “Greek” or “strained” yogurt. The first mouthful might be interesting, but it doesn’t end well.

3. Pizza or bread-bottomed foods are always safe. Not sure why, but anything made with a bread base, some type of sauce, and toppings is generally delicious. Because the largest component of the dish volume-wise is a starch, it’s usually soothing to the stomach.

4. You’ve probably heard lots of people say, “Don’t drink the water,” but the more relevant thing is, “Don’t drink anything with ice.” Most places in far-off lands assume Americans can only drink bottled water these days, so you won’t often be offered tap water unless you’re at someone’s house. You will, however, be offered lots of colas, juices, and other drinks with nice cool ice cubes, all of which I can guarantee were made with unfiltered, unboiled, un-bottled water. It’s not great to give up drinking icy cold beverages, but believe me, your digestive tract will thank you. I’ve heard, “But I didn’t drink the water!” from many a sick traveling companion, and when I ask if they had any iced drinks, their jaws usually drop and they utter things that are generally un-bloggable.

5. Do NOT eat at any of the following types of restaurant unless it is recommended by a local who has eaten there before and that person is going with you and you actually SEE the person put the food in his or her mouth: Mexican, seafood (especially sushi), any street food vendor. I have eaten at many wonderful establishments from all three of these categories, but I can tell you I’ve also walked into a few on my own, ordered something, looked at it/smelled it, paid, walked out, and bought a bag of chips and a Snickers bar instead. It’s not worth the risk, and just like in the US, these three types of restaurants are the riskiest when they don’t come with a personal recommendation and a chaperone willing to eat with you.

6. Try anything you want — just make sure (again) that you’re in an establishment recommended by a local as the “best” place to try it. I’ve eaten a lot of crazy things and some of them have been delicious, some not — but none of them have made me sick, and I thank my local colleagues for that.

7. As an addendum to #6, if you want to try crazy food, I suggest asking a local to order things for you so you won’t know what exactly you’re eating. It makes you more objective, relieves some of the anxiety you may have of eating whatever it may be, and it makes things more fun for your local friends. I speak from experience when I say everyone at the table loves watching you eat a mouthful and exclaim, “Mmm, this is great! What is it?!” when they get to respond “Lamb brains!” It’s fun for the whole family.

8. Don’t expect American fast food to taste the same in other countries. You’ll only be disappointed — or pleasantly surprised, if you’re a fast-food detractor like the HG’s Alison. They actually use a surprising number of local spices, oils, and other ingredients — including meat. McDonald’s and CocaCola are two that spring to mind. Both tailor their flavors and products to local tastes and use locally produced ingredients. While it may be comforting to wander into a McDonald’s after a long trip of kebabs or goat stew, I’m generally more homesick after getting just a hint of US “expedited cuisine.”

9. Grilled dishes are usually the tastiest and the safest. Different parts of the world have their different versions of BBQ or grilling, and there’s usually quite a bit of regional pride in the technique. Ordering grilled food also ensures that you’ll actually be able to see what you’re eating — making it easier to spot fish or meat that may be less-than-fresh or “iffy.” With no sauces or heavy breading to disguise it, you’ll also be able to taste the real flavor of what you ordered, which is probably why you ordered it in the first place.

10. Olive oil and wine are the apples of exotic travel — a dab and a glass a day keep the doctor away. Not sure why, but do you really need a reason?

1. Mel

   August 14 12:50 p.m. 1

   Sort of an anti-tip, but I found that in Central and South America, hotels/ resorts that cater to Americans usually have a water filtration system for all the water used in the hotel. Check with a hotel when you stay to see if they have a filtration system.

2. escott

   August 17 12:20 p.m. 2

   That's definitely a good point - but be sure and ask what kind of filtration or treatment system they use. Some may filter out minerals, etc. but they may not treat it for bacteria or other tiny things that can still make you sick. You also have to trust that they keep it well-maintained... which can be difficult to do in some parts of the world.

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